Were you getting excited about the new episodes of Futurama we’re finally getting?

Not so fast. 20th Century Fox thinks all the fangirls and fanboys can interface with their asses by biting them and they’re looking to recast pretty damn much every single voice actor on the show. In a statement, 20th Century Fox said:

“We love the Futurama voice performers and absolutely wanted to use them, but unfortunately, we could not meet their salary demands. While replacing these talented actors will be difficult, the show must go on. We are confident that we will find terrific new performers to give voice to Matt and David’s brilliantly subversive characters.”

The call sheet that’s been spreading across the internet seeks to replace John DiMaggio, Phil LaMarr, Katy Segal and Maurice LaMarche, meaning that among other characters Fry, Leela and Bender will all be newly voiced. DO NOT WANT, 20th Century Fox.

This move seems especially poor considering it was fan geekdom alone that resurrected the show in the first place. The kind of people who watch Futurama are the kind that will not take new voices well and dude, it’s risky enough to resurrect a show that’s so loved and so long off the air. Is it just me, or is this like if they brought back Family Guy without Seth McFarlane? I mean, in fairness, the resurrection of Family Guy went pretty well. This, this does not look good. Let’s hope it’s just some form of Hollywood hardball and fans are the hostages.

Anyway, read it and weep, honey. Full text of the casting call, below. And if you’re reading this, 20th Century Fox, you may bite my glorious golden ass.

Thursday, Jul. 16, 2009, 5:54 PM Pacific

FUTURAMA
Voice Over
Episodic
1/2 hour animated comedy for Twentieth Century Fox Television
SAG

Creators Matt Groening and David X. Cohen
Casting Director: Scott Muller
Shoot/Start Date: August
Pay Rate: TBD
Location: Los Angeles

SUBMIT ELECTRONICALLY
OR
FOR SUBMISSION OF AUDIO ONLY (MP3S ON CD PLEASE) KING OF THE HILL
ATTN: SCOTT MULLER
15821 VENTURA BLVD.
ENCINO, CA
91436

VOICE AUDITIONS MAY BE SENT IN THE FOLLOWING WAYS:

1. MP3 AUDIO AUDITIONS ONLINE IN WHATEVER MEANS IS CONVENIENT FOR YOU.

2. MP3 AUDIO AUDITIONS ON CD.

3.EMAILED AS ATTACHMENTS TO: FUTURAMA@SCOTTMULLERCASTING.COM (NOTE: PLEASE USE THIS METHOD SPARINGLY, ATTACHMENTS NOT TO EXCEED 5 MB) AUDITIONS SHOULD BE SENT ASAP AS WE WILL BE MOVING QUICKLY. PRODUCER SESSIONS WILL BE HELD AT A DATE TBD.

We are starting casting immediately for Futurama, a half-hour animated comedy created by Matt Groening and David X. Cohen. Descriptions of these established characters follow, along with links to clips of previous episodes for reference.

SERIES REGULAR ROLES:

[ PHILIP J. FRY (FRY) ]
Fry, a 20th century slacker, works as a pizza delivery boy. On December 21st, 1999, he is cryogenically frozen and wakes up 1000 years in the future in the city of New New York. Through a series of events, Fry tracks down his great (x30) nephew Professor Hubert Farnsworth and lands a job at the Professors Planet Express delivery company as a delivery boy. Fry bunks with Planet Expresss beer-swilling robot, Bender. Fry is constantly trying to win the heart of Leela, the companys ship captain…SERIES REGULAR

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=164702&title=flashback-freeze (Episode 5ACV03)

[ TURANGA LEELA (LEELA) ]
Leela, a sexy Cyclops, is the captain of the Planet Express delivery ship. Leela is in charge of every company mission, having her hands full keeping Fry and Bender in line. Her early years were spent in an orphanage where she was a bit of an outcast for having one eye. She took up kickboxing and other similar sports to make up for the lack of friends. She still has problems with men and often gets jealous of Amys (her co-worker) popularity among the opposite sex. She has a soft spot for Fry but is unsure of anything further than that, due to Frys clumsy advances…SERIES REGULAR

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=162824&title=leelas-timeline (Episode 4ACV02)

[ BENDER BENDING RODRIQUEZ (BENDER) ]
Bender, a cigar-smoking, booze-guzzling, kleptomaniac robot, had a successful career in bending girders but tired to kill himself when he found out the girders were being used for suicide booths. He was saved by Fry and later took a job at Planet Express. To be able to function properly, Bender needs the chemical energy from alcohol. Excessive drinking is mandatory or he will become sober and unable to control his body. Magnets stuck to his head make him sing like a folk singer…SERIES REGULAR

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=188899&title=bender-the-drone (Episode 5ACV05)

[ PROFESSOR HUBERT FARNSWORTH (PROFESSOR) ]
Professor Hubert Farnsworth is the owner of the Planet Express delivery company, which he uses to fund his strange scientific experiments. He also lectures at Mars University on the mathematics of quantum neutrino fields (he made up the name so no one would dare take the course). He is technically 160 years old, but to avoid being picked up by the sunset squad and taken to the near death star he says he is only 150…SERIES REGULAR

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=217636&title=back-in-action (Episode 5ACV01)

[ DR. JOHN ZOIDBERG (ZOIDBERG) ]
Dr. Zoidberg, a lobster-like alien, left his home planet of Decapod 10 to become a rich doctor but instead became the Planet Express staff doctor (doesnt pay so well). Zoidberg, who is usually shunned by the rest of the Planet Express crew, is always in search of his next meal. His skill as a surgeon, and basic knowledge of human anatomy, are often called into question. He secretly desires to become a stand-up comedian…SERIES REGULAR

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=147743&title=love-lessons (Episode 2ACV05)

FUTURAMA RECURRING ROLES:

[ MOM ]
Mom is the very old, very rich, very ruthless founder of Moms Friendly Robot Company. She has three sons: Walt, Larry, and Igner, who work for the company and help Mom do her dirty work. Many years ago, Farnsworth worked for Moms Friendly Robot Company, and they had a fling, which ended when Mom kept turning Farnsworths cute inventions into mad, killing machines…RECURRING

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=147736&title=mothers-day (Episode 2ACV14)

[ ZAPP BRANNIGAN ]
Zapp Brannigan is a 25-star General of the Democratic Order of Planets and has been responsible for several successful wars including a triumph over the pacifists of the Ghandi Nebula. He is always accompanies on mission by his hapless assistant Kif Kroker. Behind all his bravado he is a wimp who is not very intelligent. He once slept with Leela, a fact hat he constantly reminds her of…RECURRING

http://www.hulu.com/watch/60311/futurama-zapp-in-the-shower (Episode 2ACV17)

[ KIF KROKER (KIF) ]
Kif Kroker is a hard working, long suffering alien Lieutenant of the DOOP who does all the hard work and takes the rap for problems usually caused by Zapp Brannigan (his superior officer). Zapp considers Kif to be his most loyal friend however, Kif in fact views Zapp as an imbecile. He is smitten with his current girlfriend Amy. He has no bones and is supported by a system of inflated bladders…RECURRING

http://www.hulu.com/watch/4471/futurama-kif-is-pregnant (Episode 4ACV01)

Good news everyone! They’re trying to ruin Futurama. is a post from: The Inquisitr

Twilight tattoos are not news- Stephenie Meyer cited them in her critique of certain lines in the movie.

However, the sheer volume of horrible tattoos being inked in homage to this literary abortion and the Diet Coke of vampires is astounding. Edward Cullen, as a character, squicks Robert Pattinson out:

“When you read the book,” says Pattinson, looking appropriately pallid and interesting even without makeup, “it’s like, ‘Edward Cullen was so beautiful I creamed myself.’ I mean, every line is like that. He’s the most ridiculous person who’s so amazing at everything. I think a lot of actors tried to play that aspect. I just couldn’t do that. And the more I read the script, the more I hated this guy, so that’s how I played him, as a manic-depressive who hates himself. Plus, he’s a 108-year-old virgin so he’s obviously got some issues there.”

Although not as much as the author of Twilight herself does:

“When I read it … I was convinced that Stephenie was convinced that she was Bella, and … it was like it was a book that wasn’t supposed to be published, like reading her — her sort of sexual fantasy about some — especially when she says that it was based on a dream, and it’s like, “Oh, then I had a dream about this really sexy guy” and she just writes this book about it, and there’s some things about Edward that are just so specific that … I was just convinced that this woman is mad, she’s completely mad, and she’s in love with her own fictional creation. And I sometimes … feel uncomfortable reading this thing, and I think a lot of people feel the same way, that it’s kind of voyeuristic … It creates this sick pleasure in a lot of ways.”

And yet Twitards fangirls who haven’t yet seen True Blood are lining up to get huge, ugly ass tattoos all over their back acne. Via Geekologie, a collection compiled over at ONTD.

Well that’s… passive-aggressive.

Because the lettering itself wasn’t ugly enough.

Stupid. On your forearm. Until you die.

Maybe this chick just doesn’t like doggy style.

Ha ha! That totally looks like Corey Feldman!

Lamesauce: Twilight tattoo gallery of fail is a post from: The Inquisitr