The Inquisitr » deer

Deer Invasion Causes Disruption in New Jersey School

Duncan Riley — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 04:53:07 +0000

A school in Hamilton, New Jersey has an interesting surprise Monday: a deer invasion.

Two deer jumped through a window at the school (as they do), startling three students and a teacher. Fearing more deer could be on their way, the four fled, locking their attackers in the room.

Animal control officers later tranquilized the animals and removed them, according to local reports.

There were no reports of injuries.

Barry Bonds Killed Bambi

Samantha DeWitt — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 10:47:32 +0000

Barry Bonds the disgraced former base ball player has provided a “celebrity” endorsement for Christensen Arms who make high powered hunting rifles. Who would have thoight that Barry Bonds and Sarah Palin had that much in common.

Now I’m no vegetarian, card carrying member of PETA, but I am appalled by his whopping for joy, and posing with the dead buck.

He also provided a written endorsement

With this super wide whitetail closing in, the only thing I had to worry about was putting the crosshairs on the front shoulder, and the rifle would do the rest. One blast is all it took.

By closing in he means the buck was wandering in a field minding its own business. And I guess he would know all about how “one blast was all it took”.

If you must there is a video on the Christensen website where you can watch him kill Bambi a “monster white tail” deer in Canada, fast forward to the 7 minute mark unless you want to watch all the awkward macho talk about rifles and pumping blood etc.

I guess the roids would explain it- although why Christensen would want him to endorse their product is beyond me. In other news the perjury trial against Bonds continues despite a couple of the charges being dropped.

Vicious Bambi 1: Maryland Lobbyist 0

Samantha DeWitt — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 09:53:22 +0000

WTOPnews.com is reporting that Gilbert Genn, a Maryland lobbyist was attacked by a deer outside his home which stabbed him with its antlers when he went to take his dog Yuffie (not a typo) for a walk.

Genn tried to stop the deer attacking Yuffie and was a little too successful as it decided to take him on instead. You can’t make this stuff up.

“It came right at me, from about 10 feet away. I tried to run at an angle, but it caught me flush in the back right leg, impaled me with its weight, knocked me to the ground. It started to come right at my face with its antlers.”

The buck gored Genn in the chest, but he managed to kick it in the belly.

“It impaled me in the groin area. At that point, literally, I took the antler and pulled it out of me.”

Genn said one of his first thoughts was Steve Irwin, although Genn obviously lived to tell the tale and presumably doesn’t randomly yell CRIKEY!

Genn went on to accuse the deer of being a Republican.

“Not to get too partisan, but I’m convinced it was a Republican deer, because it happened right where we had our Obama sign. And all the deer could do was attack, attack, attack. So it had to be a Republican deer.”

This claim is suspicious because clearly no self respecting deer would suppport a ticket that had Palin on it, that would be like voting for genocide.

Nobody Expects A Deer Break And Enter

Duncan Riley — Tue, 13 May 2008 00:48:57 +0000

Owners of Taylor’s Treasures in Dover, York County PA say they thought the loud noise that woke them up in the middle of the night was traffic or storm damage. They were wrong.

The deer found its way back out of the store leaving the owners with about $3,000 worth of damage.