In what has to be one of the best Fake Steve Jobs posts Dan Lyons pretty well rips AT&T a new one as being a slime bucket of the telecommunications world by suggesting that iPhone users should cut back on their usage to make life easier for AT&T.

However this beautifully crafted vitriol may have to be rethought according to a post by Randal Stross in the New York Times today. Like most people Stross was more than willing to pile his iPhone’s woes onto AT&T because after all Apple can do no wrong so therefor is just has to be AT&T who are to blame.

Right?

Well, maybe not.

When I set about looking for independent data, however, to confirm the superior performance of Verizon’s network, I was astonished to discover that I had managed to get things exactly wrong. Despite the well-publicized problems in New York and San Francisco, AT&T seems to have the superior network nationwide.

And the iPhone itself may not be so great after all. Its design is contributing to performance problems.

Roger Entner, senior vice president for telecommunications research at Nielsen, said the iPhone’s “air interface,” the electronics in the phone that connect it to the cell towers, had shortcomings that “affect both voice and data.” He said that in the eyes of the consumer, “the iPhone has the nimbus of infallibility, ergo, it’s AT&T’s fault.” AT&T does not publicly defend itself because it will not criticize Apple under any circumstances, he said. AT&T and Apple both declined to comment on Mr. Entner’s assessments.

Stross goes on to mention several other companies who have data as well that shows that AT&T’s service far from being at the bottom of the pile is actually head and shoulders above their competitors. It may turn out that all the problems that everyone is screaming to high heavens about have nothing to do with the network they are being run on but may in fact reside with the iPhone itself.

If this is indeed the case it kind of gives new credence to the report from Strand Consult that iPhone users are suffering from a delusional form of the famous Stockholm Syndrome.

Regardless it doesn’t change the fact the the Fake Steve Jobs post is a classic and still makes me laugh my ass off.

Will Fake Steve Jobs have to eat his words about AT&T? is a post from: The Inquisitr

Dan Lyons seems to have retired to a life of taking pot shots at the very blogosphere that made him more than a nobody in the larger scheme of things. It’s too bad though that he didn’t learn anything during his stint of impersonating a real famous person who actually can move stock markets with a single word because his little quip filled post yesterday on his boring reproduction of intelligent thought only shows just how little he even pretends to understand the blogging world.

In his single overlong paragraph of a post he suggests that blogs are good for nothing more than circle jerking each other over boring news like Apple’s refreshed product line and Jon Stewart’s little humorfest over Twitter. Funny how he neglects to point out how the old media – who he is obviously back prostituting for full time now – is no different. Just turn on any of the cable news channels and you will see the plasticine looking talking heads all talking about the same story. I guess though it is okay in his book for them to inundate us with constant polarized points of view because they are real journalists’ like him – not dirty little bloggers.

As well he seems to conveniently  gloss over the fact that much of the news as he and his gym locker buddies like to believe is their exclusive purvue was more than likely first broken by people using Twitter or on those nasty dirty blogs. Like MG Siegler pointed out on his ParisLemon blog much more nicely than I would have

Fourth, Lyons tells it like all tech blogs do is rehash other news. That’s simply not true, every site he listed has scooped several big stories just in the past few months alone. We will continue to do so. I have a few I’m working on right now, in fact.

Well at least you can say that Dan did manage not to forget during his time impersonating a blogger how to make sure his linkage gets him the most exposure. Too bad he didn’t stick with the Fake job he might have actually been able to write a really good sarcastic post about all this.

Nice try at sarcasm Mr. Lyons is a post from: The Inquisitr

Dan Lyons, the writer/ journalist formerly know as The Real Dan Lyons formerly know as The Fake Steve Jobs is quitting blogging after having a post yanked this week by his employer Newsweek.

Jordan Golson from the Industry Standard reports that Dan told him “that he is hanging up his personal blog as RealDanLyons.com after his Newsweek bosses made him yank his post where Lyons (rightly) called Yahoo’s PR staff ‘lying sacks of shit’

 
Lyons slammed the company after Yahoo flacks told him just weeks ago that the Google/Yahoo search deal was a “sure thing” and that Jerry Yang wasn’t going anywhere. “Then that deal fell apart. And now Jerry Yang is out on his ass. The take-away: Do not believe a word that Yahoo says. Ever.”

We aren’t sure exactly how things went down, but the Yahoo PR post and several others are gone too.
 

You can read my early post today that has the complete transcript of the post he was ordered to pull. Also while Dan was out slamming people today he also had a few choice words for AllThingsD writer Kara Swisher

 
Lyons slammed All Things Digital’s Kara Swisher for touting an “exclusive” that Yang was stepping down — an exclusive that was posted five minutes before Yahoo’s official press release — and then emailing other reporters who failed to note that she “broke” the story. Those highly amusing posts are gone from his site too.
 

This folks is the ugly side of blogging when you are doing it for a paycheck. Luckily enough I have a great enough boss here at The Inquisitr that this type of thing isn’t something I have to worry about.

In the meantime – give ‘em hell Dan. You are my hero for the day.

Dan Lyons Says Kiss My Ass and Quits Blogging is a post from: The Inquisitr

Case in point was a post he wrote yesterday about the ouster of Jerry Yang that was a great reminder of why his Fake Steve Jobs blog became as famous as it did. Unfortunately his masters at Newsweek didn’t seem to be in agreement and as a result his Jerry Yang out post has turned into a 404 page

So what was it that was so bad about Dan’s post? Well lucky for you I just happen to have a copy saved in my feed reader which you can now read in its entirety below

And Chairman Roy Bostock says it’s the right time for this to happen. I only wish you could have been on the phone for my conversation just — what — a month ago, when the same Roy Bostock swore up and down to me that Jerry Yang wasn’t going anywhere because he was absolutely the greatest leader the world has ever known. “Nobody knows this company better than Jerry Yang,” said Roy. “Jerry is the right person to continue to lead Yahoo.” Roy also insisted that Yahoo did the right thing by passing up Microsoft’s offer, even though the stock now stands at one-third the price Ballmer had offered to pay. See that story here. I’d never dealt much with Yahoo before, and I was stunned by their PR operators — they’re really an unsavory bunch. During that same reporting this crack team of lying sacks of shit put one of Yahoo’s attorneys in Washington on the phone to tell me, over and over, the true “inside story” of what was going on with the Google deal, which was, he informed me, that the deal with Google was a sure thing, definitely going to happen, no way in hell is the deal not going to happen, there are no real objections from the regulators, they’re fine with it, the objections from advertisers are not an issue, blah blah blah. Then that deal fell apart. And now Jerry Yang is out on his ass. The take-away: Do not believe a word that Yahoo says. Ever.

One more thing: Will Microsoft come back to the table? And how much will they pay?

Like they say – on the Internet nothing ever really disappears. As Paul Boutin asked in his post about this

We can’t think of a single Fake Steve Jobs post that Dan redacted while at Forbes. Can you?

Well can you?

Has Newsweek thrown the gag around Dan Lyons? is a post from: The Inquisitr