Google answers your burning questions

Sadly, it's not a search result by accident- it's the name of a book by Vanessa Feltz. (Yes, the book is actually titled What Are These Strawberries Doing on My Nipples, I Need Them for the Fruit ... Read >

Casino denies man $166m jackpot after slot malfunction

The Seminole Hard Rock Casino in Tampa has settled with a guest for an undisclosed sum after an erroneous slot machine result lead the man to believe he'd won $166 million on Sunday. Bill Seebeck was playing $4 ... Read >

German Court Denies Buddhist Bank Robber’s Request To Visit With Cat

Whirl, Germany (AHN) - A Buddhist bank robber's plea to have his cat visit him in jail was turned down by a German court-even with the caveat that the cat is the reincarnation of his mother. Peter Keonig, ... Read >

The Following Ad Sums Up The Internet Nicely

Indeed: The Internet, all this and more. Where do I sign up :-) (via Reddit) Related posts:A Reddit Powered TV Show: I’d Like To See ThatThe Internet Turns 40Twitter could soon play nicely with its neighbors Read >

Whose fans are douchier, Yankees or Phillies?

The Daily Show went into the trenches of douchbaggery to find out which fans are the douchiest. While Yankees fans held their ground, Philly edged ahead to snag the douchiness cup. The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon - Thurs ... Read >

Onion: Car crash victim tragically not Glenn Beck

There is no harder thing than to have Glenn Beck outlive your child... Victim In Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck Related posts:Video: Glenn Beck calls Obama a racistWhat moves Glenn Beck to tears?Glenn Beck Adds Appendicitis Attack ... Read >

British Man Allergic To His Own Wife

Sprotbrough, England (AHN) - A British man says he breaks out into a rash if he gets too close to his wife. The 45-year-old is allergic to a common ingredient used in many creams and body lotions. Darren ... Read >

“Twilight Barbies” now available

Did you, too, find the lack of sex in the Twilight novels to be a deal-breaker? Despite the fact the Bella and Edward had absolutely no chemistry and you were kind of rooting for the van, you can ... Read >

VW Tuareg 1 vs Tesla 0

What happens when a VW Tuareg, Tesla and Toyota Prius meet in the one spot? Well according to a story out of Denmark in October, the above happens. A translation at What's Up With That says that the ... Read >

Christopher Walken makes Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face” somehow enjoyable

Never thought you'd see the day? Christopher Walken does his Christopher Walken thing reading Lady Gaga's Poker Face, with predictably awesome results. Related posts:Lady GaGa Admits she goes Gaga for the LadiesLady GaGa Goes Topless for V Magazine (NSFW ... Read >

Cannibul Cake

Cannibul Cake eyes next victum Related posts:Fail CakeUltimate Apple FanBoy Birthday CakeIncredible steampunk wedding cake Read >

Authentic Nacho Fail

Free Nachos, apparently now an authentic Irish experience to be sure to be sure. Related posts:Irish National Liberation Army (INLA) To Renounce Violence, DisarmFail: Illinois cracks down on sexting, applies law to all nude imagesFail: Automattic CEO takes ... Read >