Today is December 23, 2012. Or, to Seinfeld fans, today is the wonderful holiday known as Festivus.
Festivus, the Costanza family tradition that involves an unadorned steel pole and events like the airing of Grievances, has two origin stories. Nancy Wurtzel of the Huffington Post reports notes that the true beginnings of the holiday happened in the 1960s in the O’Keefe household. Daniel O’Keefe would eventually become a writer for the sitcom Seinfeld and wrote his family experience into the show.
The other origin story comes from the lips of Frank Costanza.
“Many Christmases ago I went to go buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man … As I reigned blows upon him I realized there had to be another way. The doll was destroyed, but out of that, a new holiday was born. A Festivus for the rest of us.”
Festivus revelers rid themselves of all of the commercialism inherent in Christmas to have a more wholesome holiday. So instead of decorating a Christmas tree this year set up a simple Festivus pole. And instead of giving thanks for a wonderful dinner, air out your grievances and tell everyone why they disappointed you this year. And instead of ending the holiday with hugs and kisses, strip down to your Manzier (or Bro) and tell your guests that they aren’t allowed to leave until they beat you in the annual feats of strength.
Oh, and instead of reveling in the miracles of Jesus. Make sure to label easily explainable coincidences as Festivus miracles.