Anna Duggar continues to be haunted by her husband’s past transgressions, and her in-laws are partially to blame for the current focus on Josh’s infidelity.
It’s almost been two years since Anna Duggar discovered that her husband broke his marriage vows by cheating on her. Anna decided not to divorce Josh, and the former 19 Kids and Counting stars have tried to move on with their lives. However, Josh’s infidelity continues to cast a dark shadow over a marriage that once touted as the type of godly union that other Christian couples should strive for. Unfortunately for Anna, anytime her famous in-laws offer marriage guidance, Duggar fans and critics alike immediately think of her marriage woes and wonder whether she is heeding their advice.
The possibility of causing Anna Duggar discomfort has not stopped Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar from sharing sex advice with other Christian husbands and wives, and the Counting On stars are often asked to speak at marriage retreats. A Colorado pastor named Kenny Batson was in attendance at one such event recently, and the Duggars’ words had a profound effect on him. He later recounted Michelle and Jim Bob’s advice during one of his sermons.
“What they talked about was this matter right here. Intimacy in marriage. And Michelle said something that I’d never thought, I mean I knew of it but I never thought like she put it,” Baston recalled.
“She said ‘Ladies, your husband can get his laundry done by other women, he can have his meal cooked by other women, he can have all kinds of things done for him by other women, but there’s only one woman who can meet that strong need he has that God put in him, and it’s you. Only you, lady.'”
The pastor put a more extreme spin on Duggar’s words, labeling women who don’t have sex on demand “narcissistic” and “self-centered.”
“It is one of the greatest sins of women today, is a self-centered narcissistic view of how they are to have control of their bodies,” Baston said. “The Bible says your body is not your own, sister. It is your husband’s.”
As the Hollywood Gossip reports, there’s speculation that Michelle Duggar had Anna in mind when she spoke at the marriage retreat. But was she really trying to shame her daughter-in-law for not having enough sex with Josh?
This is not the first time the former 19 Kids and Counting star has been accused of blaming Josh’s infidelity on Anna. In an October 2015 blog post, Michelle gave wives similar advice about the importance of meeting “that strong need” their husbands have. Josh had confessed to cheating on Anna just two months earlier, so Patheos believes that Michelle’s words were aimed at her daughter-in-law.
“So when you are exhausted at the end of the day, maybe from dealing with little ones, and you fall into bed so exhausted at night, don’t forget about him because you and he are the only ones who can have that time together. No one else in the world can meet that need,” Michelle wrote.
“And so be available, and not just available, but be joyfully available for him. Smile and be willing to say, ‘Yes, sweetie I am here for you,’ no matter what, even though you may be exhausted and big pregnant and you may not feel like he feels. ‘I’m still here for you and I’m going to meet that need because I know it’s a need for you.'”
However, if what a Duggar family insider said is true, Anna didn’t need to read her mother-in-law’s words to feel like Josh’s infidelity was her fault. Shortly after Josh confessed to being unfaithful, a source close the Duggars told People that Anna was already prepared to “absorb some of the blame” for Josh’s actions and that she wouldn’t just be accused of withholding sex from her husband.
“Maybe not publicly, ever, but privately, there will be some suggestion of whether or not she should have been more aware of the pressures Josh was under, of the issues he was facing, and how she could have better counseled him or helped him,” the source said.
While Michelle Duggar believes that the secret to happy marriage is for a wife to have sex with her husband whenever he’s in the mood, she also says that there are times when a woman should take a break from being “joyfully available.” According to Today, the Duggars believe that women should abstain from sex 80 days after giving birth to a baby girl and 40 days after giving birth to a baby boy.
Anna Duggar is currently pregnant with her fifth child, a baby boy.
[Featured Image by Duggar Family/Facebook]