Twitter’s newest celebrity is old, cantankerous, and probably has no idea he’s even tweeting.

Justin, a 28-year-old dude who lives with his dad, has decided to tweet some of the random comments made by his elderly father. Justin explains:

I’m I’m 28. I live with my 73-year-old dad. He is awesome. I just write down shit that he says.

The Twitter account, @shitmydadsays, is full of hilarity and win. Some sample tweets:

“Who is this woman?….Kate Beckinsale? Well, you can tell Kate Beckinsale she sucks.”

“You need to flush the toilet more than once…No, YOU, YOU specifically need to. You know what, use a different toilet. This is my toilet.”

“Don’t touch the bacon, it’s not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i’ll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing.”

“Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn’t stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down.”

“My flight lands at 9:30 on Sunday…You want to watch what? What the fuck is mad men? I’m a mad man if you don’t pick me the hell up.”

“It’s watering plants, Justin. You just take a God damned hose and you put it over the plant. You don’t even pay rent, just do it. Shit.”

And my personal favorite:

“Your mother made a batch of meatballs last night. Some are for you, some are for me, but more are for me. Remember that. More. Me.”

The account’s been around for less than a month and already has over 60,000 followers. And it’s only following one person- Levar Burton. Is Justin’s dad a fan of Reading Rainbow?

Twitter’s newest celebrity: some old dude is a post from: The Inquisitr