Mashed Potato Slurpee at 7-11? It Sort of Exists

A mashed potato Slurpee sounds like the product of a fevered stoner nightmare, or perhaps Japan, but a new video shows that the technology to dispense a savory snack in the manner to which we’ve grown accustomed seeing our favorite ice-slush treats served.

Yes, the mashed potato Slurpee exists technically, although not in the form for which we’re used to seeing Slurpees dispensed. But thanks to the magic of YouTube, even if you don’t live in Singapore (home of the real mashed potato Slurpee), you can probably get as close to a mashed potato Slurpee as any reasonable human being with a respect for nature and the way it is supposed to work can get to one of these horrific potato-based monstrosities.

If you’ve seen a nacho cheese machine at 7-11, you have the mashed potato Slurpee concept down pat. Much like cheese is unnaturally dispensed from the font of a nacho machine at America’s favorite convenience store during any hour of the 24-hour cycle, so too does a stream of potato-paste spew forth from a similar contraption.

And there is also this part of the mashed potato Slurpee — remember those coffee machines they’d have in places like the DMV before Starbucks was invented, where first coffee liquid was spurted out like so much bad anime before hot water gears turned on and gushed out a stream of steaming milk-liquid or boiling H20 to create the cup of coffee-like beverage?

That’s basically how a mashed potato Slurpee is made. Which makes it like even wronger than one might imagine, and you can watch a video of the mashed potato Slurpee machine — rumored to be arriving stateside at some point in the future — in the clip below.