So, how many stoners have to live in your house for you to need a Ben & Jerry’s lock?
Yes, a Ben & Jerry’s lock. It is what it sounds like. A physical lock for a pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream that enables you to walk away from the freezer and ensure that when you return, it won’t be to two half-melted spoonfuls of New York Super Fudge Chunk and a sheepish expression on your roommate’s face.
I’ll tell you, if the Ben & Jerry’s lock existed then, it might have saved my marriage. Many a time one partner invested in a single pint of Phish Food to share, only to discover that when the hankering for a chocolate-y, Phish-y treat arose, the mostly-empty pint awaited the aggrieved shopper.
So, you’ve got a problem- your freezer is an insecure zone for your pint of Chubby Hubby (like mine was for my favored Cool Britannia, *sniffle*), and you’ve decided you want to beef up your frozen treat security in the wake of late-night Americone Dream thievery.
Simply navigate over to the Ben & Jerry’s website and for the low (and strangely random) price of $6.64- or roughly the cost of two pints of Cherry Garcia- the Ben & Jerry’s lock could be yours.
Of course, take caution not to get too high and forget your three digit password, or unlock your pint before 4:20.
And it wouldn’t be a Ben & Jerry’s lock without a silly name, and the device itself is branded as such: “Ben & Jerry’s Euphori-lock ©: I’m terribly sorry, but there’s no ‘u’ in ‘my pint.’”