Surprisingly, this is not a joke. Miller’s job is to create artificial dog testicles to be implanted into canines who have been neutered. For those curious as to what prevailing logic could have possibly resulted in his highly unusual occupation, Business Week quoted Gregg having said:
“Dogs aren’t stupid. They would know if they eye was gouged out, or their foot was cut off. Why wouldn’t they know if their testicles are now missing?”
While there are those who will surely laugh at the dog testicle salesman, 59-year-old Miller claims his business has become widely successful with 517,223 neutered canines across all 50 U.S. states and 49 countries wearing his Neuticles.
What exactly are these Neuticles? According to Miller:
“They’re testicular implants for pets.”
While Neuticles don’t technically have a biological purpose, Miller and his customers seem to believe that they serve as an “emotional Band-Aid,” aiding neutered canines in the process of recovering from the trauma of castration surgery.
Testicles, a subject which invariably leads to either giggling or grimacing, were a tough sale for telemarketers initially hired by Miller upon launching the canine prosthetic company. Who wants to get called by a stranger during dinner time to discuss testicles (regardless of whether or not they’re canine prosthetics)? Miller was quoted having said:
“When Neuticles were introduced commercially in 1995, people thought I was nuts.”
These days, Gregg’s Neuticles are available in a variety of sizes and styles which range in price from $119 to $600. The more expensive variant, known as the UltraPLUS, are composed of silicone which, according to Miller, are “very lifelike.”
What are your thoughts on Gregg Miller’s success making and selling prosthetic dog testicles?