Viral Birthday Letter From Birth Mom Reaches Daughter! Reunited After 22 Years

More than two decades ago, Vickie Wieberg, 16, and Ashley Becker, 17, made one of the most difficult, and selfless, decisions of their lives. They gave up their newborn daughter for adoption, in the hopes that she would find the life that they were unable to give her. But they never forgot her. They never stopped loving her. When Vickie poured out her heart on June 3 in a birthday letter she posted on Facebook, she didn’t expect it to go viral. But it did, and now she and Ashley have been reunited with their daughter, Mary Pat!

When birth dad Ashley Becker received the text from his high school sweetheart, “We found her,” he was floored. A couple of years ago, he had tried, unsuccessfully, to locate her, but ran into a brick wall. He hadn’t held out much hope for the Facebook post.

Mary Pat’s adoptive mother, Pam Detten, describes the events as a “whirlwind.” The niece of one of her best friends is one of Vickie’s Facebook friends. She saw the story, recognized some of the details, and contacted Pam. Thus Pam was able to see the letter before her daughter did.

Pam told The Inquisitr that Mary Pat’s adoption was special from the beginning. She and her husband, Dr. Russ Denton, saw how very loved their baby was, and how much of a loving decision by her birth parents the adoption was, a decision supported by both of their families. The baby even came with gifts, “amazing symbols of love”: Vickie’s baby ring, and a yellow baby afghan that had been Ashley’s when he was a baby. There was no doubt in her mind that Mary Pat’s parents loved her immensely.

When she read Vickie’s Facebook letter, Pam knew that it was the right time to present it to her daughter, and let her meet her biological parents.

Over the course of Mary Pat’s life, Pam and Russ laid the foundation for the time she would meet her parents. Pam, too, had written a story for her little girl, describing the Detten’s intense desire to have a child, but being unable for the eight years prior to Mary Pat’s adoption. She began reading the story to her when she was three years old. Their family prayers always included prayers for Mary Pat’s biological parents.

Mary Pat grew up knowing that she was adopted, and that she was loved, by both sets of parents. Several times, Mary Pat wrote about her adoption for class projects for school.

At the time of the adoption, Vickie and Ashley made a pact that, no matter where their lives took them, any searches for their daughter would be done together. Ashley says they “didn’t remain a couple, but always stayed a team” with this. Their lives diverged as adults, but they could “always agree on this,” that they loved their daughter, that she came first.

As The Inquisitr previously reported, Vickie never intended to post her heartfelt letter, but she sensed that “It’s time.” She felt compelled to hit the “send” button.

She told Ashley about it immediately, but he didn’t anticipate that it would find its way to Mary Pat.

Neither expected the huge impact that the letter has had, especially on birth parents, adoptive parents, and adoptees. It has been an inspiration to many.

When Mary Pat was six years old, the adoption agency sent an unusual request to the Dettens. Ashley’s father was terminally ill. It was his dying wish to see a picture of his granddaughter before he was gone. The Dettens graciously honored that request and sent a photo of Mary Pat, age 6, in some overalls and a little hat. Ashley says that a number of family members have copies of that picture now, the only one since her birth.

It was that photo that made the idea of his daughter being found go from “plausible” to “no doubt that it’s my daughter” in Ashley’s mind. After he heard the news, he went to Mary Pat’s Facebook page and looked at her pictures. “Maybe” she looked like him; “maybe” this could be happening.

But then, he saw a photo. In it, Mary Pat was a little girl, wearing the same pair of overalls, with the same hat, with the same freckles that had been indelibly imprinted on his mind from the single picture he possessed of her. It was her. It was certain.

From there, it was a whirlwind of events, culminating in a beautifully emotional reunion.Vickie says her father always had faith that it would happen one day.

Vickie and Ashley dropped everything to make the trip to their daughter’s hometown, and arranged to meet in a cafe. Naturally, they were nervous. All of them had heard stories of reunions that have not gone well. Questions tugged at each mind. Will she want to see us? How are we alike? How are we different? Will this go well? How will reality compare to expectations?

“It was amazing.”

Ashley and Vickie arrived first. Vickie excused herself to go fix her makeup. That was when Mary Pat appeared. Ashley, self-described as a loud, vocal man never at a loss for words, was speechless. When he saw her standing there, he says, “My mouth didn’t know how to work.” And Vickie wasn’t there. They had always agreed to do this thing together.

But even though he was instantly “a bowl of jelly,” he knew her immediately. “I looked at her, and I knew THAT’S MY DAUGHTER.” He has thought of her for 22 years, and he says, “I just love her.” He adds, “She’s the most beautiful girl in the world to me.”

Vickie “didn’t have to include me,” Ashley told The Inquisitr. But he is “grateful that she did.” He spoke very highly of Vickie’s great character. Fortunately Vickie returned quickly, and was overwhelmed at seeing her baby girl after 22 long years.

The reunion was “just simply amazing,” according to Vickie, “so easy and beautiful.”

Very shortly after that first wonderful reunion, they went out again to Buffalo Wild Wings with Mary Pat’s adoptive parents, Dr. Russ and Pam Detten. What could have been a very awkward situation was anything but. It was “almost unbelievable.” The visit was described as “almost like meeting old friends.” Pam is one of those people who puts people at ease immediately.

Pam brought pictures that Mary Pat drew in elementary school. Vickie brought Pam the hospital picture that was taken of Mary Pat, a picture that Vickie has treasured over the years as the only thing connecting her to her daughter that “only she had.”

Both mothers brought their picture of the parents holding their baby, one for the last time, and one for the first. The resemblance is striking.

Vickie was surprised at the joy of the adoptive parents. She said that they are “totally selfless,” and “they should be the spokespeople for adoption.” Ashley said he is grateful for this couple, who are “super supportive”, openly and readily welcoming these “strangers” into their lives.

Both dads cried.

Since that reunion, Mary Pat has met two of her brothers, who love her very much. The rest of the family eagerly anticipates meeting her. In Vickie’s letter, she told how her children have always celebrated their big sister, drawing pictures of her in school, never forgetting that she exists.

Ashley Becker also got to spend Father’s Day with his daughter, their very first together:

“I didn’t have a great Father’s Day. I had an absolutely amazing Father’s Day!”

This poignant story of a birth mother’s emotional Facebook letter to her child given up for adoption has a happy ending. But sometimes these stories don’t end so well.

Vickie believes that it is good for the soul to have answers. “There is healing in closure.” There is a hunger deep inside for something to complete that part of the soul that is missing, even if the answers aren’t what you want to hear. She says:

“I have learned that even if things don’t turn out the way you expect them to, knowing is still better than wondering. The unknown is unsettling.”

There are times that children are put up for adoption by parents who are not as loving and selfless as Vickie and Ashley. Some stories don’t have a beautiful, happy ending like this one. The sad reality is that some children grow up in homes where they are abused or they aren’t treasured by the very people who should love them the most. For those people, Pastor Bo Walker of Global Harvest Church offers this comfort:

“So they don’t want you. So they don’t love you. Father God has loved you since before He created anything. He knew you and loved you before you were born. He knows everything about you and He loves you. He loves you so much He sent Jesus to die for you. He sent Holy Spirit to be your Guard, your Guide, and your Compass. He has always loved you and always will. He will never leave you nor forsake you.”

This story, of birth mother Vickie Wieberg writing a heartfelt birthday letter to the daughter that she and Ashley Becker gave up for adoption 22 years ago, “could not be better in any way,” according to Mary Pat’s gracious adoptive mother, Pam Detten. This story has a fairy tale ending, an ending which is, in reality, a new beginning for them all.

[images courtesy of Vickie Wieberg, and bing]