Ariana Grande may be a harmless fun-loving 20-year old to most, but to aging pop queen Madonna, Ariana could be a deadly threat.
No sooner had Ariana Grande posted pictures of herself on Twitter posing seductively on a motorbike, then the old ‘Material Girl’ herself crawls out of her cave, dusts off the cobwebs, and wouldn’t you know it, does the same damned thing as Ariana, and shares a picture of herself sitting provocatively on a motorbike.
Which begs the question, why do women, especially famous women like Ariana Grande and Madonna always have to sit on a motorbike in a ‘provocative’ or ‘seductive’ fashion. Can’t they just ride the darn things?
The pics Ariana Grande posted on Instagram show Ariana not just sitting, but kneeling provocatively on the back of a motorbike, which isn’t very clever or wise, unless you’re Evil Knievel.
Ariana is clothed in traditional biker gear, including a short, black and white vintage dress and is wearing the sort of stilettos that would make a Hell’s Angel or a least a Son of Anarchy proud.
Obviously the fact that Ariana is back in heels means that she must have made a full recovery after slipping in a pool of dog urine and breaking her toes. Ouch!
To cap this unintentionally hysterical picture off, Ariana Grande appears to be staring thoughtfully into space like she’s just overdosed on the complete works of Friedrich Nietzche.
Ariana is also arfuly holding a half-sucked lollipop. What this is meant to signify, Ariana Grande alone knows, but as a whole, the picture of Ariana is all kind of staged and signifies not much apart from perhaps an industrial ego and an all-consuming vanity.
Of course, like attracts like, and into the frame steps Madonna to belly barge Ariana out of the picture.
Like a hugely fiercely competitive and gone to seed mother-in-law, well past their sell-by-date, but equally unable to admit their playing days are over, the 1980′s icon attempts to pee all over Ariana Grande’s parade by proving to the young upstart Ariana who the real biker babe is.
Madonna posted her pic with the caption, ‘Feeling a little butch today!’ and it shows the old lady reclining on a BSA in black lace lingerie, a jacket and fingerless gloves, looking to all extent and purposes like some kind of transsexual Clay Morrow.
In place of Ariana Grande’s lollipop, Madonna is sucking on a cigarette.
Can this whole thing just be some kind of strange coincidence, or is Madonna having a mid-life crisis and declaring war on Ariana Grande? Who knows? Who cares?