Valeria Lukyanova 101: Truths, Half-Truths, And Outright Lies


Valeria Lukyanova’s latest interview with GQ editor-in-chief Michael Idov has all but caused an internet meltdown as of late. Lukyanova seems like the distillation of the 21st century’s horrific tendency to celebrate fame for fame’s sake; both a homogenous amalgamation of every reality star to ever set foot in front of a digital camera, and a hideous piece of living performance art intended to reflect and magnify the fruits of our global obsession with style at the expense of substance. As one stares into that blank, uncanny-valley visage, Valeria Lukyanova becomes sort of a walking, talking, living and breathing Portrait of Dorian Gray, one that may never appear to age to the naked eye, but grow ever uglier with each new sentiment that comes tumbling out of her improbably plasticky mouth.

However, she is not the Human Barbie.

The fact that there are more than one of these types of people roaming around the Western Hemisphere might be a fairly compelling argument to allow room for some new species to take our place at the top of the food chain, but the distinction remains all the same. So in the interest of cataloguing this lunacy for the sake of our future overlords, here’s how to tell the difference between Valeria Lukyanova and the Human Barbie.

Valeria Lukyanova does not refer to herself as the Human Barbie, and Sarah Burge does.

Valeria Lukyanova refers to herself as Amatue. Sarah Burge is the one laying claim to the Human Barbie moniker. Amatue claims to have had very little plastic surgery to achieve her look, while Human Barbie claims she spent more than $50,000 on plastic surgery in one sitting alone. That rumor about the $7,000 dollar plastic surgery coupon for her 7 year old daughter? It was true, but again that was Sarah Burge the Human Barbie, not Lukyanova (who doesn’t have kids, and calls the idea of having children “a nightmare”).

Amatue also claims that she is an astral projection teacher, and communicates with aliens through, as she puts it, “the language of light”. And while we’re talking about light…

Valeria Lukyanova does not try to subsist only on light and air.

A few months back, much was made of Amatue’s reference to herself as a “breatharian”; one who eschews food and even water in an attempt to live on sunlight alone, like some cactus made out of meat. It is unclear as to how long Lukyanova may have tried the Vitamin D Only diet, but during the GQ interview she ate food; juices mostly. Lukyanova’s eating habits do not appear to be any different than anyone living in South Beach with a moderate drug habit and/or eating disorder.

Valeria Lukyanova is a horrible racist.

Actually, that one seems totally true. As both a proponent of eugenics and one who refers to the mixing of races as “degeneration”, Valeria Lukyanova’s views on race might be the most twisted thing about her – which is saying something.

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