Breaking: Rep. Weiner Asks For ‘Leave of Absence’

Beleaguered Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY), the congressman at the center of the sexting scandal that has ridiculously gripped the nation since Memorial Day, has sought a leave of absence in the wake of calls for him to resign his post.

Weiner, who retains majority support within his constituency not to resign, has begun a course of treatment- ostensibly to address his habit of occasionally dabbling in cybersex. The New York Times ran a statement from a Weiner rep:

“Congressman Weiner departed this morning to seek professional treatment to focus on becoming a better husband and healthier person,” said the spokeswoman, Risa Heller. “In light of that, he will request a short leave of absence from the House of Representatives so that he can get evaluated and map out a course of treatment to make himself well.”

Quick, the internet: report immediately to treatment centers after you finish fapping. Seriously, is dirty chatting now a rehab-worthy offense?